Okay, so I know blogging can be whatever you want it to be. I had started this as a way to keep my family, etc updated on us….what’s new, etc. I never wanted it to be something where I complained all the time, or just did the “woe is me” thing. However, I’m frustrated. Very frustrated, and I need to vent and ask for help/advice.
Potty training. Yeah, I know. I talk about it a lot. But, when it doesn’t go right, it starts to consume a lot of time and thoughts. Caleb STILL isn’t potty trained. It’s been 4 months since we started. This is what we’ve tried.
Sticker charts: every time he went he’d get a sticker on his chart. When his chart was filled, we made a special trip to the store to pick out a prize. It was usually Thomas the Tank engine. Once he got really good at it, he just got a sticker for staying dry until he went. He now refuses stickers.
Candy: once he stopped using stickers, we’d give a few M&M’s if he’d stay dry until using the potty. He now doesn’t care
Matchbox Cars: They’re $1 a piece…when he poops, he gets to pick one out of his bag. If he stays dry all day, he gets to pick one out of his bag. It works quite well for pooping, but offers no incentive to stay dray.
We have sang more songs about peeing/pooping than I’d like to admit. I’ve tried to make it a game.
He is in underwear (actually cloth training pants) when we’re home. He has to change himself when he has an accident. I just help with the snap. He also has to clean up any accident he has on the hardwood floor (carpet gets shampooed). Some days he’ll go 2 ½ to 3 hours between accidents. Some days he’ll go 30-45 minutes.
About a month or two after starting this “journey,” Caleb was telling me every time he had to go. For a week straight he stayed dry all day and dry during naps (which I wasn’t expecting for a LONG time). He would stay completely dry at daycare. Actually, at daycare, she didn’t even have to remind him. He’d just go when he had to go and came out for help with his snap.
We have not gone through any stressors that would be a trigger for regression. Absolutely nothing. I’ve thought and thought and thought about anything that would cause him to want to regress.
We thought it was an attention thing since Abby takes up so much of our time and energy. We’ve made it a point to take Caleb for one-on-one time, frequently. It hasn’t made a difference.
I even called the pediatrician…..in the back of my mind I was wondering about overactive bladder or a bladder infection. Because he’s so sporadic with the periods of time he stays dry, they don’t think it’s overactive bladder. Also, to get a sample to check for an infection, I’d have to get him to pee into a cup. Yeah, right…..he won’t go into a public restroom…and you think I can get him to hit a cup when he won’t go in the toilet?!? He hasn’t complained about it hurting or anything….and hasn’t had fevers, except with his cold. I can usually tell a UTI by the smell (that’s what I get for being a nurse)-sorry if that was too much information! Anyway….they said they didn’t think it was an infection and to keep an eye on it…..call if he has a fever or complains when he goes. They said to completely back off….even put him back in diapers and tell him to let us know when he’s ready to try it again. I’m not sure I want to back off completely. I think that would be counter-productive, but I’m not sure of anything right now.
Abby has started to show interest. We’re poop-training her right now, and she’s very comfortable/willing to sit and try. Caleb gets very jealous when we do that….that worries me. If we go full-force with Abby, what’s going to happen with Caleb? I don’t want to miss my window with Abby though, either.
I’m frustrated and honestly struggling with thoughts that I’m somehow failing him as a parent because I can’t figure out what he needs right now. I know people read my blog…..they tell me about it. I would really like for you guys to leave comments on what you think. T- I know you’ll respond Well, thanks for listening to my venting……that really is what’s occupying us right now. Exciting, eh?
2 comments:
Man Kel that stinks. I would kind of agree with the doctor and back off, put him in a diaper and treat him like a baby. He will probably not like it and give him the incentive to actually be a big boy and wear underwear and keep them dry. As for Abby I would just go for it because it might help him want too but if it doesn't at least you have one less in diapers! He would be in a diaper so it wouldn't be like he would be having accidents on the floor to lash our while you are potty training her. He will love the fact his baby sister was potty trained before him, when he gets older ;) I'm sorry this is such a struggle. I've never had a kid act like that for training so I really don't have much help to offer. Hang in there and know he won't be 18 and still wearing a diaper!
This is the very thing we struggled with for Jacob. Katelynne started training before he would even try. Then just one day he got it. Now we are struggling with Katelynne. I decided to just back off for a while and put her back in pullups till she let me know she was ready. It really drained all of us with the fight we had with Jacob and I realize now that it just is not worth the fight. Like Tonya said just think about the fact that he will not be 18 still in diapers (even though that was the way I felt every day with the potty trainin of Jacob!)
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